I now understand why teachers go MIA during finals week. JEEZ LOUISE!!! IF ONE MORE PERSON EMAILS ME OR CALLS ME OR JUST DROPS BY TO SEE HOW THEY'RE DOING I'M GOING TO SCREAM!!!!!
That's why I like being an adjunct and having another job-- I can always be away during finals week, but as it is, I now have an office on campus so I'm here everyday. I guess I was the same way. I never thought to think that the teacher probably has 80+ other students besides myself.
Deep sigh. I have an event this afternoon and I am soooooooooooooo not looking forward to it.
Maybe it's the end of the year/ pre-holiday jitters.
Thursday, December 14, 2006
Friday, December 08, 2006
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Monday, November 20, 2006
Where in the World is Natalie Merchant???
I didn't realize how much I was into music until I started my blog. Anyway, I'm listening to Natalie Merchant's "Kind and Generous". I could listen to her music forever. Are there any other black Natalie Merchant fans??? I'm going to close my office door and sing to the heavens. :)
I feel like I should be sharing some smart philosophical observations about life and society. Maybe I will one day, however, today I will indulge in the trivial things in life.
My favorite alternative music artists/bands
Annie Lennox
Natalie Merchant (10,000 Maniacs)
Alanis Morissette
Dido
Cold Play
Maroon 5
Duran Duran (does that count?)
I feel like I should be sharing some smart philosophical observations about life and society. Maybe I will one day, however, today I will indulge in the trivial things in life.
My favorite alternative music artists/bands
Annie Lennox
Natalie Merchant (10,000 Maniacs)
Alanis Morissette
Dido
Cold Play
Maroon 5
Duran Duran (does that count?)
Which Desperate Housewive Are You?
My quiz says I'm Bree... controlling. I think it's right on the money. http://abc.go.com/primetime/desperate/quiz/index.html
Sunday Sushi
I went out with my line sisters last night. Of the eleven of us, nobody would think to pick Patrice, Beth, and I to be the ones who still keep in touch. I had a good time--- felt sorry for the waitress. Going out to dinner with my sorors is always interesting. :)
Wednesday, November 15, 2006
An Article About Tanya
This article pretty much sums up the Tanya I knew in college.
Clayton County Police Officer Tanya Crowder: Nov. 1973 - Nov. 2006
Police pay final respects to one of their own, celebrate life
By Daniel Silliman
He thought she couldn’t be serious about being a cop. When Tanya L. Crowder walked into the Clayton County Police Department to be interviewed by her hiring board in 2004, Acting Chief Jeff Turner was there and didn’t believe it.
Crowder, then 30, was a beautiful woman with a big smile, he said, the mother of a small son. She had every hair in place.
She didn’t look like a police officer.
“She made it clear to us that she was gong to be a police officer and she was going to be the best,” Turner said. “By the end of the meeting she had us eating out of her hand.”
Crowder, a Kansas native, joined the police force on Dec. 20, 2004. Those who worked with her remembered her smile, more than anything, and they remembered the way she never complained.
“I don’t believe I ever met anyone who nothing bothered until I met Tanya,” Turner said.
Shortly after she joined the Clayton Police, on her way to becoming a great cop, Crowder was diagnosed with a rare form of cancer. She went through six cycles of chemotherapy that failed to shrink the tumor in her right leg. After the chemotherapy failed to stop the cancer, her leg was amputated.
Through all that, her co-workers said, she never complained and she returned back to work in the watch office on crutches.
“She said, ‘See, I told you I’d be back,’” said Maj. Tim Robinson. “She simply came to work and did her job.”
Seven months after the surgery, the cancer returned, this time to 32-year-old Crowder’s scalp and lungs.
Crowder’s supervisor, Sgt. S. Holmes, said Crowder never missed a day as a police officer if she didn’t have to.
“I can always remember her smiling. Even though she was in pain she would always show up for work,” Holmes said. “She was a trooper. She was a fighter.”
Crowder died Thursday night.
Friends, family and co-workers gathered at Divine Faith Ministries International Friday to pay their last respects, to remember her smile, to celebrate her life and to say a prayer before sending Crowder’s body to its final resting place in Kansas.
“She was certainly loved by her police department family,” said Robinson. “I had the pleasure of being greeted by her beautiful beaming smile every morning.”
The gathered friends and co-workers who spoke at the funeral Friday returned again and again to Crowder’s smile.
“Here truly lies a child of God,” Turner said.
Clayton County Police Officer Tanya Crowder: Nov. 1973 - Nov. 2006
Police pay final respects to one of their own, celebrate life
By Daniel Silliman
He thought she couldn’t be serious about being a cop. When Tanya L. Crowder walked into the Clayton County Police Department to be interviewed by her hiring board in 2004, Acting Chief Jeff Turner was there and didn’t believe it.
Crowder, then 30, was a beautiful woman with a big smile, he said, the mother of a small son. She had every hair in place.
She didn’t look like a police officer.
“She made it clear to us that she was gong to be a police officer and she was going to be the best,” Turner said. “By the end of the meeting she had us eating out of her hand.”
Crowder, a Kansas native, joined the police force on Dec. 20, 2004. Those who worked with her remembered her smile, more than anything, and they remembered the way she never complained.
“I don’t believe I ever met anyone who nothing bothered until I met Tanya,” Turner said.
Shortly after she joined the Clayton Police, on her way to becoming a great cop, Crowder was diagnosed with a rare form of cancer. She went through six cycles of chemotherapy that failed to shrink the tumor in her right leg. After the chemotherapy failed to stop the cancer, her leg was amputated.
Through all that, her co-workers said, she never complained and she returned back to work in the watch office on crutches.
“She said, ‘See, I told you I’d be back,’” said Maj. Tim Robinson. “She simply came to work and did her job.”
Seven months after the surgery, the cancer returned, this time to 32-year-old Crowder’s scalp and lungs.
Crowder’s supervisor, Sgt. S. Holmes, said Crowder never missed a day as a police officer if she didn’t have to.
“I can always remember her smiling. Even though she was in pain she would always show up for work,” Holmes said. “She was a trooper. She was a fighter.”
Crowder died Thursday night.
Friends, family and co-workers gathered at Divine Faith Ministries International Friday to pay their last respects, to remember her smile, to celebrate her life and to say a prayer before sending Crowder’s body to its final resting place in Kansas.
“She was certainly loved by her police department family,” said Robinson. “I had the pleasure of being greeted by her beautiful beaming smile every morning.”
The gathered friends and co-workers who spoke at the funeral Friday returned again and again to Crowder’s smile.
“Here truly lies a child of God,” Turner said.
Thursday, November 09, 2006
These Three Words...
My friend passed away yesterday morning. RIP Tanya C. You will forever be a part of my college memories.
Really puts life into perspective-- tomorrow isn't promised. I try to make sure people know I care about them. I am sentimental, but I never want them to question my feelings for them. I make it a point to tell them that I love them--every chance I get.
These Three Words
When was the last time
That they heard you say
Mother or father, I love you
And when was the last time
That they heard you say
Daughter or son, I love you
Ones you say you cherish everyday
Can instantly be taken away
Then you'd say I know this can't be true
When you never took the time
To simply tell them "I love you"
When was the last time
That they heard you say
Sister or brother, I love you
And when was the last time
That they heard you say
Darling or best friend, I love you
The one for whom you'd give your very life
Could be taken in the twinkling of an eye
Through you tears you'd ask why did you go
Knowing you didn't always show
Just how much you loved them so
Really puts life into perspective-- tomorrow isn't promised. I try to make sure people know I care about them. I am sentimental, but I never want them to question my feelings for them. I make it a point to tell them that I love them--every chance I get.
These Three Words
When was the last time
That they heard you say
Mother or father, I love you
And when was the last time
That they heard you say
Daughter or son, I love you
Ones you say you cherish everyday
Can instantly be taken away
Then you'd say I know this can't be true
When you never took the time
To simply tell them "I love you"
When was the last time
That they heard you say
Sister or brother, I love you
And when was the last time
That they heard you say
Darling or best friend, I love you
The one for whom you'd give your very life
Could be taken in the twinkling of an eye
Through you tears you'd ask why did you go
Knowing you didn't always show
Just how much you loved them so
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
PMS and the Unsuspecting Student Worker. . .
The student worker in my office has no idea that he’s one stupid question shy of getting his head bit off… Why did he ask me a question, then hand me his pen to fill out HIS paper work. I looked at him, then his pen, and continued what I was doing.
Do they not see me glaring at them from the brim of my glasses? Can’t they tell today is NOT the day for idle chit chat .
Lord, please help me and the students get through the day. . .
Do they not see me glaring at them from the brim of my glasses? Can’t they tell today is NOT the day for idle chit chat .
Lord, please help me and the students get through the day. . .
Politics Anyone???
I tried to hang on for the election results, but by 11 o'clock I was knocked out. I went to bed last night angry with the voters in my state, only to be awakened by the news that my candidate actually won. Every election for the last six years has been a true disappointment to me and I couldn't take another election let down.
It's going to get very interesting. I'll admit it, I'm glad the Dems have the House, and I'd be elated to see them take over the Senate. What I can't understand is America taking six years to realize that you CAN'T have a Republican President, and a Republican controlled House and Senate--- that's just asking for trouble. I’m wondering why it took folks six years to realize. What's even more puzzling to me is the fact that-- like 2000, 2002, and 2004 the margin is still so slim. You'd think after all the things we've learned the last six years that there would be some great uproar--- but alas... the same people are voting the same way.
It's going to get very interesting. I'll admit it, I'm glad the Dems have the House, and I'd be elated to see them take over the Senate. What I can't understand is America taking six years to realize that you CAN'T have a Republican President, and a Republican controlled House and Senate--- that's just asking for trouble. I’m wondering why it took folks six years to realize. What's even more puzzling to me is the fact that-- like 2000, 2002, and 2004 the margin is still so slim. You'd think after all the things we've learned the last six years that there would be some great uproar--- but alas... the same people are voting the same way.
Monday, November 06, 2006
I'm Sad. . .
I honestly don't think I can take anymore bad news. 2006 will definitely be a year that I will never forget. I lost my grandfather earlier this month, a good friend of mine lost her mother last week, and Friday I found out that a college friend of ours (me and my sister) would not make it past the weekend.
I am in total shock on so many levels. I met Tonya and Erica our freshman year. I remember them as the TLC girls b/c they were always dressed like TLC. Anyway I introduced them to my sister and the five of us (Erica A., Tsnya, Ericka B, my sister and I) were always together. We went to all of the parties together. Tanya was a natural hair stylist and hooked everybody's hair up for a small fee. Anyway, she, Erica B. and my sister ended up being college roommates and really good friends. Throughout the years our lives have taken us on different paths, but they still managed to keep in touch. Tanya called us on our birthday and I remember hearing the same cheerfulness of her voice. In spite having been diagnosed with cancer, and having her leg amputated, Tanya still remembered to call. Later that month we found out the doctors found additional lumps on her head, and lungs. We always assumed she'd get better-- of the five of us, Tonya was the healthiest and most athletic. It just didn't seem real that she wouldn't get through this. Friday was her 33rd birthday. Today they are going to turn off her breathing machine.... Something is so wrong...we shouldn't have to think about this--we're still young--
I am in total shock on so many levels. I met Tonya and Erica our freshman year. I remember them as the TLC girls b/c they were always dressed like TLC. Anyway I introduced them to my sister and the five of us (Erica A., Tsnya, Ericka B, my sister and I) were always together. We went to all of the parties together. Tanya was a natural hair stylist and hooked everybody's hair up for a small fee. Anyway, she, Erica B. and my sister ended up being college roommates and really good friends. Throughout the years our lives have taken us on different paths, but they still managed to keep in touch. Tanya called us on our birthday and I remember hearing the same cheerfulness of her voice. In spite having been diagnosed with cancer, and having her leg amputated, Tanya still remembered to call. Later that month we found out the doctors found additional lumps on her head, and lungs. We always assumed she'd get better-- of the five of us, Tonya was the healthiest and most athletic. It just didn't seem real that she wouldn't get through this. Friday was her 33rd birthday. Today they are going to turn off her breathing machine.... Something is so wrong...we shouldn't have to think about this--we're still young--
Friday, November 03, 2006
White Flag. . .
In light of recent events. I believe the lyrics of Dido's song are quite appropriate.
(Blushes slightly, holds head down, and hits the play button).
After reading the lyrics, I will not be sharing. LOL
Nevermind.
(Blushes slightly, holds head down, and hits the play button).
After reading the lyrics, I will not be sharing. LOL
Nevermind.
Monday, October 30, 2006
A Sade Moment
For some unknown reason I feel like listening to Sade today. I'm listening to "Ordinary Love". Is this really wise? Half way through the song and I'm not trying to hurl myself over a cliff... so I do believe I AM OKAY. :)
Saturday, October 28, 2006
I MADE IT THROUGH
I didn't think I would and to be honest, I thought I'd really lose it. God works in the strangest ways. He had given me time to truly prepare. I knew he wouldn't live to be 100, but a part of me just knew he would wake up. I feel okay about it. I've said goodbye.
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
Anticipation....
I do not want to go to my grandfather's wake. I'm going to b/c I have to. I don't want him to be alone. Realistically I know he's not here, but I have to be there. I'm anticipating the fact that this is real. There is no turning back. A chapter in my life has ended. No more Nana and Grandpa who were always a few steps or a quick sneak through the backdoor away. Growing up I hated living in a two family flat next to my grandparents. I dreamed of living in a big house in the suburbs with my parents, unattached to my grandparents.
Isn't life funny that way? The things you dread as a kid become the things you cherish as an adult. The forced piano lessons, forced trips to Soulards Market with Nana and Grandpa b/c no one else would go, the forced conversation about the importance of saving money, the many sleepless nights listening to the his thumping his piano, playing his favorite song, over and over.
Now, I'd give anything to go back--just once-- to the wampth of my grandmother's smile, the stroke of her hands across my head, the eerily comforting smell of dax grease and freshly pressed hair, the taste of her cornbread dressing or the straight from the jar of her self-prepared preserved ---peach cobler, the smell of my grandfather's freshly stuffed pipe. . . .
(Deep breath)
I don't want to go.
Isn't life funny that way? The things you dread as a kid become the things you cherish as an adult. The forced piano lessons, forced trips to Soulards Market with Nana and Grandpa b/c no one else would go, the forced conversation about the importance of saving money, the many sleepless nights listening to the his thumping his piano, playing his favorite song, over and over.
Now, I'd give anything to go back--just once-- to the wampth of my grandmother's smile, the stroke of her hands across my head, the eerily comforting smell of dax grease and freshly pressed hair, the taste of her cornbread dressing or the straight from the jar of her self-prepared preserved ---peach cobler, the smell of my grandfather's freshly stuffed pipe. . . .
(Deep breath)
I don't want to go.
Sunday, October 22, 2006
My Grandfather Died This Weekend....
I am okay with it. I had five weeks to really let it sink in. He'd been in a coma. How many people can say that they lived to be 91. Better yet, how many people can say they lived by themselves sick-free until they were 90. Not a whole lot. He's with Nana, and they're probably smiling down on us now.
Good bye and thank you for being the best grandfather a girl could want.
Thanks for the many stories of "the way it was."
Thanks for the many unsolicited lessons on dignity, faith, and self-reliance.
Thanks for loving me unconditionally and believing in me.
Thanks for waiting for me on my "late work nights". If everyone else was sleep, I knew you'd be there, sitting in the door, waiting for me to pull my car to the curb.
There are so many things, but I'm pretty sure he knows what he meant to me. May you rest in peace.
(JCM 1915-2006)
Good bye and thank you for being the best grandfather a girl could want.
Thanks for the many stories of "the way it was."
Thanks for the many unsolicited lessons on dignity, faith, and self-reliance.
Thanks for loving me unconditionally and believing in me.
Thanks for waiting for me on my "late work nights". If everyone else was sleep, I knew you'd be there, sitting in the door, waiting for me to pull my car to the curb.
There are so many things, but I'm pretty sure he knows what he meant to me. May you rest in peace.
(JCM 1915-2006)
Wednesday, October 11, 2006
Am I A Slave to My Hair???
YES. I AM.
I love hair... talking about hair... doing hair... washing hair... It's my favorite idle hobby. No, I can't change the world by washing my hair, but it makes me happy. :)
I am thinking about having a real focus with my blog. Maybe a health/losing weight/pampering myself blog. Not sure.
Stay tunned. (That's for you Stephen since you are the ONLY person who reads my blog).
I love hair... talking about hair... doing hair... washing hair... It's my favorite idle hobby. No, I can't change the world by washing my hair, but it makes me happy. :)
I am thinking about having a real focus with my blog. Maybe a health/losing weight/pampering myself blog. Not sure.
Stay tunned. (That's for you Stephen since you are the ONLY person who reads my blog).
Monday, October 09, 2006
Another Epiphany While Watching TCM
I'll admit it. I spend my Saturday nights washing my hair and watching old movies. Anyway, I recorded Bright Eyes and watched it. I don't know, maybe I'm tainted, but the movie was REALLY WEIRD!!! I guess I'm a product of my time, but there was something creepy about watching a six year old girl partying with a room full of grown men.
Am I wrong for feeling this way????
Am I wrong for feeling this way????
Monday, September 18, 2006
Which Greys Anatomy Character Am I??
Okay. I don't have time to write, but I do have endless time to do these stupid online polls....
You are GEORGE!
You may be a love-sick puppy, but it's kind of cute in a girly-guy kind of way. You are a caring friend and a genuinely nice guy -- which might be why you always seem to finish last. But, your undying loyalty makes you the best sort of friend to have.
235 other people got this result!
This quiz has been taken 992 times.
22% of people had this result
Added to say: I really thought I'd be Bailey.
You are GEORGE!
You may be a love-sick puppy, but it's kind of cute in a girly-guy kind of way. You are a caring friend and a genuinely nice guy -- which might be why you always seem to finish last. But, your undying loyalty makes you the best sort of friend to have.
235 other people got this result!
This quiz has been taken 992 times.
22% of people had this result
Added to say: I really thought I'd be Bailey.
Thursday, September 14, 2006
No Time to Write . . .
I havent had anytime to write. . . Besides teaching a full load, I also work full time and on top of that, having to take care of sick relatives is a chore. I was at the hospital Tuesday visiting my grandfather. I have never been inside a hospital more than I have these past three months. My mother and my grandfather being sick has taken a toll on me and my siblings. Good health is something people truly take for granted. I MISS LAST YEAR. . .
Friday, September 08, 2006
What Type of Chocoalte Are You??
I'm bored. . . so I thought I'd do a survey. This one was dead on. This is so definitely ME.
You are Milk Chocolate
A total dreamer, you spend most of your time with your head in the clouds.
You often think of the future, and you are always working toward your ideal life.
Also nostelgic, you rarely forget a meaningful moment... even those from long ago.
You are Milk Chocolate
A total dreamer, you spend most of your time with your head in the clouds.
You often think of the future, and you are always working toward your ideal life.
Also nostelgic, you rarely forget a meaningful moment... even those from long ago.
Wednesday, September 06, 2006
Dr. Christian Troy.....
All that is wrong in the world is right now that Nip/Tuck is back!!! Let me just say that last night's episode reminded me why I truly love this show. Great writing, great acting, great aesthetics-- Julian McMahon is BEAUTIFUL. Not in the typical pretty boy way, but seriously, that man is gorgeous.
I really had more to say, and although I wanted to rush to my computer to write a glowing review, I went to bed-- I had a 7 o'clock class that I needed to be well-rested for. The writers did not disappoint. I am so glad "The Carver" story line is over. I really hate morbid violence and that was a little more than I could take. It looks like the writers are going back to what makes the show so great to begin with-- CHEMISTRY. The chemistry between Sean, Julia, and Christian is ridiculous.
I really had more to say, and although I wanted to rush to my computer to write a glowing review, I went to bed-- I had a 7 o'clock class that I needed to be well-rested for. The writers did not disappoint. I am so glad "The Carver" story line is over. I really hate morbid violence and that was a little more than I could take. It looks like the writers are going back to what makes the show so great to begin with-- CHEMISTRY. The chemistry between Sean, Julia, and Christian is ridiculous.
Friday, September 01, 2006
Lost My Ipod Yesterday. . .
I didn't know a person could become so attached to an electronic device. I don't know where I had it last. I remember taking it to the gym, but I don't remember anything after leaving the gym. I looked everywhere, and for the life of me I don't know where it is. I can't workout without my Ipod. It's hard enough dragging myself to the gym, but to have to workout and listen to loud techno music is the absolute worst.
So--I bought a new one today. I've been dreaming about this one since I got my Nano for Christmas. It was worth it. . .
So--I bought a new one today. I've been dreaming about this one since I got my Nano for Christmas. It was worth it. . .
Thursday, August 31, 2006
Random Questions. . .
1. What does Fergie's song, London Bridge mean?? I don't get it. I love the song and it's got that "good beat you can dance to" vibe but really---what does it mean?
Anybody else like songs they can't understand??? I'll have to find the lyrics and analyze.
2. What's with John Norris' hair?? I'm watching the VMAs and once again I'm not understanding the orange mushroom on his head.
3. Are Erika and Janelle really as stupid as they appear? (If you're a Big Brother fan then you'll understand the question)
4. Why is P. Diddy STILL making albums, better yet why is Beyonce rapping in her new song????
Anybody else like songs they can't understand??? I'll have to find the lyrics and analyze.
2. What's with John Norris' hair?? I'm watching the VMAs and once again I'm not understanding the orange mushroom on his head.
3. Are Erika and Janelle really as stupid as they appear? (If you're a Big Brother fan then you'll understand the question)
4. Why is P. Diddy STILL making albums, better yet why is Beyonce rapping in her new song????
St. Louis More Dangerous Than Iraq??????
I had a recruiting event today. . . and I just HAPPENED to be sitting next to an Army Recruiter. I immediately started thinking about a Dateline NBC report about the aggressive tactics of US Army Recruiters. To be honest, this guy was so good that by the end of the day he had ME thinking, "Maybe I should join up. . ." But in all seriousness, he was a nice guy--about thirty something and he had the most Norman Rockwell looking young solider who couldn't have been more than 19 sitting next to him. The older guy did most of the talking while the younger guy second everything he was saying. He kept going on and on about how much money a person can earn by joining the Army. They could get 20,000 cash just for signing up, that didn't include the 150,000 they're guaranteed for college, and when they're finally ready to settle down and get a house, Uncle Sam would be their automatic co-signer.
"How'd you like to work in Germany, Korea, England, Italy, or Thailand???" Not once did he mention Iraq or Afghanistan.
"What about Iraq?"
"Iraq isn’t that dangerous. Hell, if you live in some parts of St. Louis it’s more dangerous than Iraq. Look at the news?"
I watched as the young people---men and women, some educated, most not, eyes light up when he mentioned the possibility of earning so much money. I wanted to scream, "Don't believe the hype... don't get sucked in," but I didn't. I sat there listening. . . thinking about the Rockwell Soldier, J. Kennedy. Where would he be in six months? What about his wife and stepchild? Would he be going to Germany, Korea, England. . or some other not so pleasant place???
"How'd you like to work in Germany, Korea, England, Italy, or Thailand???" Not once did he mention Iraq or Afghanistan.
"What about Iraq?"
"Iraq isn’t that dangerous. Hell, if you live in some parts of St. Louis it’s more dangerous than Iraq. Look at the news?"
I watched as the young people---men and women, some educated, most not, eyes light up when he mentioned the possibility of earning so much money. I wanted to scream, "Don't believe the hype... don't get sucked in," but I didn't. I sat there listening. . . thinking about the Rockwell Soldier, J. Kennedy. Where would he be in six months? What about his wife and stepchild? Would he be going to Germany, Korea, England. . or some other not so pleasant place???
Monday, August 28, 2006
Temporary Gifts
I love old movies. I could spend an entire weekend watching Turner Classic Movies. I used to watch AMC religiously as a child. My brother and sister would make fun of me b/c I'd rather watch "It Happened One Night..." than "New Jack City." To be honest, that's still a movie I have yet to see. Sue me.
I was watching "Zigfield Girl" with Jimmy Stewart, Judy Garland, Lana Turner and Heddy Lamour. It was a good drama. I don't really do the musicals (okay I do the Sound of Music, My Fair Lady, and West Side Story but that's IT!!).I thought it would be a really silly musical and there's nothing worse than a black and white musical. The movie was good, but I couldn't help looking at the young pretty Lana Turner and comparing it to the "old" Lana Turner. It reminded me of the "temporary gifts" my aunt is always shoving down the younger generation's. At our recent family reunion we had postboard pictures of our family from the early 1900- to the present. My aunt kept going on and on about beauty being a temporary gift from God. She constantly referred to Aunt's _____ beauty, or Aunt____ used to be so pretty. Look at them now. "It's a temporary gift from God," she said and pointed to the various women in the room. "Everyone used to have it, so you better enjoy it while you can."
How much time do I have left???
I was watching "Zigfield Girl" with Jimmy Stewart, Judy Garland, Lana Turner and Heddy Lamour. It was a good drama. I don't really do the musicals (okay I do the Sound of Music, My Fair Lady, and West Side Story but that's IT!!).I thought it would be a really silly musical and there's nothing worse than a black and white musical. The movie was good, but I couldn't help looking at the young pretty Lana Turner and comparing it to the "old" Lana Turner. It reminded me of the "temporary gifts" my aunt is always shoving down the younger generation's. At our recent family reunion we had postboard pictures of our family from the early 1900- to the present. My aunt kept going on and on about beauty being a temporary gift from God. She constantly referred to Aunt's _____ beauty, or Aunt____ used to be so pretty. Look at them now. "It's a temporary gift from God," she said and pointed to the various women in the room. "Everyone used to have it, so you better enjoy it while you can."
How much time do I have left???
My Song for the Week (Imagine Me)
Okay. . I'm totally feeling Kirk Franklin's "Imagine Me." Not only are the lyrics touching, but the song is just beautiful. I am going to be playing this all day today. ..
Imagine me loving what I see when the mirror looks at me cause I imagine me.
In a place of no insecurities and I'm finally happy cause
I imagine me.
Letting go of all of the ones who hurt me cause they never did deserve me, can you imagine me.
Sayng no to thoughts that try to control me, remembering all you told me, Lord can you imagine me.
Over what my momma said, hear from what my daddy did and I wanna live and not read that page again.
Imagine me, being free, trusting you totally, finally I can imagine me, I admit it was hard to see you being in love with someone like me, finally I can imagine me.
Imagine me
Being strong and not letting people break me down, you won't get that joy this time around. Can you imagine me.
In a world, in a world where nobody has to be afraid, because of your love, it's gone away, can you imagine me.
Letting go of my past and glad I have another chance and hard to dance cause I don't have to read that page again.
Imagine me, being free, trusting you totally, finally I can imagine me, I admit it was hard to see you being in love with someone like me, finally I can imagine me.
Imagine me
Imagine me loving what I see when the mirror looks at me cause I imagine me.
In a place of no insecurities and I'm finally happy cause
I imagine me.
Letting go of all of the ones who hurt me cause they never did deserve me, can you imagine me.
Sayng no to thoughts that try to control me, remembering all you told me, Lord can you imagine me.
Over what my momma said, hear from what my daddy did and I wanna live and not read that page again.
Imagine me, being free, trusting you totally, finally I can imagine me, I admit it was hard to see you being in love with someone like me, finally I can imagine me.
Imagine me
Being strong and not letting people break me down, you won't get that joy this time around. Can you imagine me.
In a world, in a world where nobody has to be afraid, because of your love, it's gone away, can you imagine me.
Letting go of my past and glad I have another chance and hard to dance cause I don't have to read that page again.
Imagine me, being free, trusting you totally, finally I can imagine me, I admit it was hard to see you being in love with someone like me, finally I can imagine me.
Imagine me
Friday, August 25, 2006
My Family
I thought I'd post some pictures of my Nana (the lady on the left in my profile pic) and my great aunts whom I love to death. I miss my Nana and being with my aunts makes me feel so much closer to her. I can't believe it's been ten years since her death. This is one of my favorite pictures. I love any and everything old and vintage. This picture is the epitome of class and style. There's something about the way men and women "dressed up" for dinner. When I was younger I would take old pictures to class and the first thing people would notice is Duke Ellington in alot of our family pictures. I really had no idea (much to the shigrin of my grandfather) who The Duke was. I thought he was some old long lost uncle who decided not to show up for family functions. Anyway, there is definitely a story in this picture thatI need to write and I will.... one day.
Thursday, August 24, 2006
I'm tired
I just wanted to get that out on paper. I've said it ten times already and it isn't even 10 'clock. WHY DID I VOLUNTARILY SUBJECT MYSELF TO THIS CRAZY SCHEDULE!!!! I did it, and now I must suffer the consequences. I only hope that I will be able to keep this up through December. I'll just have to stop staying up late watching meaningless reality television. DAMN BRAVO AND PROJECT RUNWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Wednesday, August 23, 2006
SO I FINALLY HAVE A BLOG
I honestly never thought I'd create a blog. My friend Stephen has been hounding me about creating one for years. I don't know, there's just something very strange about sharing who I am with the world. It's not that I am not internet savvy, or afraid. Heck, I've been online for over ten years. As a matter of fact, Stephen and I, someone with whom I feel is a very good friend, have only met ONCE. Our "cyber" friendship has consisted mostly of email, text messages, and telephone conversations---particularly when either one of us is going through relationship woes.
Alas, here I am blog and all!! Actually, I wouldn't be here if I hadn't been REQUIRED to do an online journal for a creative writing class that I'm taking. The goal was to take a class that would FORCE me to start writing again. Whenever I refer to myself, I always say writer--regardless of what particular "job" title I have, but it has been CRAZY actually trying to fit time in to write. I get so bogged down with work, goals, things I need to do, and things I have to do that being able to "sit" and create has become almost IMPOSSIBLE.
Alas, here I am blog and all!! Actually, I wouldn't be here if I hadn't been REQUIRED to do an online journal for a creative writing class that I'm taking. The goal was to take a class that would FORCE me to start writing again. Whenever I refer to myself, I always say writer--regardless of what particular "job" title I have, but it has been CRAZY actually trying to fit time in to write. I get so bogged down with work, goals, things I need to do, and things I have to do that being able to "sit" and create has become almost IMPOSSIBLE.
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